The 12 Levels of Pain

Hyperbole and a Half is officially my new favorite blog. In a hilarious post about her boyfriend’s visit to the ER, Allie Brosh created a whole new chart to illustrate the different levels of pain. Her chart and legend are below, but you REALLY have to go and read the entire post.   

0:  Hi.  I am not experiencing any pain at all.  I don’t know why I’m even here.

1:  I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.

2:  I probably just need a Band Aid.

3:  This is distressing.  I don’t want this to be happening to me at all.

4:  My pain is not fucking around.

5:  Why is this happening to me??

6:  Ow.  Okay, my pain is super legit now.

7:  I see Jesus coming for me and I’m scared.  

8:  I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain.  I might actually be dying.  Please help.

9:  I am almost definitely dying.

10:  I am actively being mauled by a bear.

11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.

Too Serious For Numbers:  You probably have ebola.  It appears that you may also be suffering from Stigmata and/or pinkeye. 

Seriously — go read the full post on Hyperbole and a Half now.  You won’t regret it.