10 Killer Kitchen Items for the Not-So-Happy Homemaker

I haven’t done a Christmas preparation post in a while, and we have 61 days left to the big day! Time to do some more shopping, people!

Managing a home might be easy for some women, but for others it can be a difficult and often thankless job — especially when juggled with another full-time job at the office.  These ten silly (and rather psycho) kitchen items can go a long way toward injecting some much-needed humor into the life of the harassed homemaker.

1.Throwzini Knife Block

Inspired by the Wheel of Death and later circus acts, the Throwzini has 5 razor sharp knives set in a high quality hand crafted wooden block — that actually spins! 

2. OUCH!™ Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder*

Make your next party painfully amusing by inviting Ouch!, the voodoo-it-yourself toothpick holder. Perfect for finger food, emergency hexes, and jump-starting the good times.

3. “The Ex” Knife Holder*

Send a not-so-subtle message to hubbies, boyfriends and potential partners… You are not someone to be messed with!

4. Splat Stan Coaster*

The kamikaze coaster! Have a little snicker every time Splat Stan gets mugged (get it? heehee) and plays the hero by protecting your tabletop from tea and coffee stains! 

5. Butcher’s Apron

Scare the crap out of your friends and family! With the Butcher’s Apron on, you’re guaranteed to get nothing but compliments on your cooking.

6. EVIDENCE™ Knife*

Do things sometimes get a little dramatic in your kitchen? Then here’s the perfect accessory to the crime — an 8-inch chef’s knife with a fired-on, food-safe design straight out of a CSI episode. The Evidence Knife comes in an individual gift box complete with an official evidence tag.

7. Condiment Gun*

Shoot ‘em up! Just fill the squeeze bottle with your favorite sauce, load it into the barrel of the gun, snap the chamber shut and you’re ready to delight the kids by playing Dirty Harriet at the dinner table.

8. ZING! Catapult Spoon*

Everyone knows you shouldn’t play with food, but hey — some people just really deserve a tomato in the eye.  Now there’s a new weapon in your homeland security arsenal — load up, aim, pull back the spring-loaded handle, and watch your food take flight. ZING! It’s WAY more fun than a war of words.

9. Hocus Poke Us

Step right up and witness an act of death defying magic! What we have here is an ordinary box with a lovely volunteer inside. Now we insert one cocktail sword after another, but she never screams for mercy. It’s amazing! … and a little disturbing.

10. Blair’s Death Hot Sauce

  Proclaimed the hottest sauce in the world by the Guinness Book of World Records, Blair’s Death Sauces come in four fiery flavours — Original Death, Jalapeño Death, Sudden Death, and After Death, in order of spiciness. Each sauce has enough heat and fire to really make you feel alive — right before it kicks your ass.

*Available at the all-new Desktop Diva Shop!

Other gift lists you might have missed:

• 10 Gifts You Can Give Yourself That the Whole Gang Will Thank You For
• 10 Fab Finds for Shoe Fiends
• 10 Creative Mugs and Cups for Coffee Lovers
• 10 Bitchin’ Gift Ideas for Your Bitchy Friends
• 12 Fun Ties to Suit All Types of Office Guys
• Top 10 Gifts for the Office Ditz

For more gift ideas, see:

• 10 Totally Brill Bags and Backpacks
• 10 Geektastic Spy Gadgets for Occasional Office Espionage
• Fun with Funds: 12 Cool Contraptions to Make Saving Suck Less
• Fun with Filing: 10 Cool Tools to Make the Task Less Tedious
• Top 10 Office Accessories for the Badass Boss